There is no such thing as failure ... only learning.
The NLP Perspective: Why Failure is a Stepping Stone to Success
This is one of the principles of NLP coaching - that failure is an opportunity to learn. It is an opportunity to reflect on what worked, and what didn't.
It is one of the principles of NLP that stuck out to me the most when I did my first training course so many years ago and a principle I stand by personally to this day. It is also a question I ask my clients when they have experienced a challenge or adversity. What did you learn? What did you learn about yourself? What do you know about yourself now that you would not have known if you had not experienced this?
Life is a lifelong learning experience - we live, we learn, We learn, we grow. When things don't go the way we had planned we have the opportunity to try things in a different way. It is an opportunity to try something differently, and as creatures of habit this can be great to help us out of our comfort zone and out of our repetitive patterns of behaviour that may no longer be helping us.
Would You Undo Your Failures? Why the Answer is Likely No
Reframing failure as a stepping stone to success can make all the difference.
If you could go back and undo all of the times you have 'failed' would you? How quick are you to use the words, fail and failure? If you were to switch the language and use alternative language and experessions, what might be different? 'Well that didn't go to plan' or 'Well, that isn't what I thought was going to happen' can have a very different 'feel' to - I failed, or that failed.
Depending on what you associate with the word failure can make such a difference. If you find the word failure evokes certain emotions and brings back certain memories then try switching the word out and trying something different.
How Failure Helps Us Find What Truly Matters
When I was at a recent 'Find Your Voice Event' on Friday a lot of people were sharing their stories, and more than once people said 'I wouldn't change it though' 'It got me to where I am today'.
Our stories can be very powerful, how we tell them can be the difference that makes the difference, not just for us, for those who hear it too.
...and that got me thinking!
How many of your failures put you on the path you are on now?
How many failures set you off in a different direction?
How many failures helped you to work out what was important to you?
Resilience and Adaptability: The Real Keys to Success
It isn't what happens to us, it's how we respond to it all that makes the difference - our resilience, our ability to flex and adapt to the things that don't go to plan - the bounce back from the set backs - that is what's important.
That is the key to success.
So, if you are facing failure at the moment, ask yourself where it might take you, what direction it might put you in and what it is helping you recognise is important.
Reframe it as an opportunity for growth.
...and as my good friend Nick tells everyone at the 'Find Your Voice' events -
"Attitude is Everything and Opportunities are Everywhere"
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